Hard to Get

This week I had the privilege of meeting Phil Stacey (a top 5 finalist on season six of American Idol) and enjoying a private concert of his at 91.5 WCIC. Our radio station rotates his hit "You're Not Shaken"...but it doesn't do justice to his gift as a live performer.
Hearing him sing "Hard to Get" (written by Rich Mullins) cracked open the door for a whole new dimension of my relationship with Christ. I journeyed through a deep valley this year and never thought I'd see the end of a dark tunnel...I also felt some pressure to have it all together as a radio personality for a Christian station. I coached myself to put on a happy face when I felt anything but happy...and felt guilty as I struggled with private doubts and fears.
So when Phil shared that he felt the same heat, it was very encouraging for me to know that even seasoned believers struggle. And at the same time, God understands our moments when we feel abandoned...and he's got us in the palm of His hand all the way. He sees the big picture while we're struggling in our flesh. So this song has become a prayer for me and I hope a source of encouragement for you, too (here's an abbreviated version of the lyrics):

You who live in heaven
Hear the prayers of those of us who live on earth
Who are afraid of being left by those we love
And who get hardened by the hurt

Do you remember when You lived down here where we all scrape
To find the faith to ask for daily bread
Did You forget about us after You had flown away
Well I memorized every word You said

Still I'm so scared, I'm holding my breath
While You're up there just playing hard to get

Will those who mourn be left uncomforted
While You're up there just playing hard to get?
And I know you bore our sorrows
And I know you feel our pain
And I know it would not hurt any less
Even if it could be explained

And I know that I am only lashing out
At the One who loves me most
And after I figured this, somehow
All I really need to know

Is if You who live in eternity
Hear the prayers of those of us who live in time
We can't see what's ahead
And we can not get free of what we've left behind

I'm reeling from these voices that keep screaming in my ears
All the words of shame and doubt, blame and regret
I can't see how You're leading me unless You've led me here
Where I'm lost enough to let myself be led
And so You've been here all along I guess
It's just Your ways and You are just plain hard to get