Trick or Treat

Let's hear it for Max from "Where the Wild Things Are" and the prettiest 50's girl who ever lived! The kids looked so yummy I just wanted to eat 'em up! My mother-in-law hand-sewed Max's phenomenal costume. He looked so darling, everyone who handed the kids treats thought Max was a girl! He wasn't exactly thrilled about that. Now Max has a complex. Next year he wants to be something decidedly masculine...like Superman!

We took the kids trick-or-treating for a while before heading over to a Harvest Party at Trinity Mennonite Church in Morton. They throw the absolute best party on Halloween night complete with carnival games, pumpkin decorating, crafts, candy, and tons of toys. My main incentive for joining the festivities, though, was getting a chance to see my baby niece...is she not the cutest little monkey you ever saw?
We were all having a great time until the party ended and the host announced that there wasn't enough candy for all the kids...so the children who regularly attended the church would have to wait until tomorrow to get their candy bags. They understandably wanted to make sure their guests didn't leave empty-handed. But I felt so guilty because Max and Laney each got a bag (on top of the all the candy they collected while trick-or-treating) while lots of other kids were bawling because they weren't getting candy on Halloween.
As Jeff and I walked to the car, we talked about giving the kids' candy bags away to those who didn't get any. But at the same time, we didn't want to incite World War II with the kids. And we didn't know how to distribute the two candy bags to all those children.
In hindsight, I regret not acting on my kind impulses...there was one girl in particular who caught my eye and I just wanted to grab Laney's bag and give it to her...ugh, I feel bad just thinking about it! But we all make mistakes...and hopefully her parents took her trick-or-treating to make up for it.
Alrightee...it's now time for me to make up for the lack of sleep I've been getting all week. Yay for changing our clocks back an hour tonight! Sweet dreams, everyone...

Dinnertime!

Making meals has become a family affair.
Between work and dealing with some personal stuff, I've been way too tired to keep up with cooking and cleaning around the house. I think Jeff got the hint tonight that he should make dinner when he found me fast asleep when he came home from work. He scrambled up some bacon and french toast tonight. The kids said it was the best dinner ever.
Meanwhile, I've been dying to make pork dumplings ever since our dear family friend, Paul, gave me a lesson in making them from scratch this weekend. It's really delish but terribly time consuming. (Email me if you want the recipe). Jeff just loves 'em...my goal was to make a hundred to freeze so that we have dinner handy in case we get snowed in this winter! I hesitated to let Max help because it gets kind of tricky but Jeff insisted he's capable and he was actually a wonderful helper once he got the hang of it.
With such capable guys in my family, I'm kicking myself for not delegating chores like cooking sooner!

The bystander effect

My stomach churned and my heart ached as I read about a 15-year-old California girl who was gang raped and beaten for two hours outside her school's homecoming dance as 20 people watched or took part. Some laughed. Others took pictures.
WHY DIDN'T ANYONE CRY--OR CALL--FOR HELP?!
I'm so sickened over this...today my mind is still preoccupied with the depravity of humanity. I've spontaneously prayed for this girl throughout the day. Jeff & I discussed this story with the children last night (omitting the term "rape" and replacing it with the term "attack")...We challenged them to stick up for their classmates if they're being bullied and to stand their moral ground even if others around them don't share their convictions. If they see someone inflicting harm on someone else and they fail to say anything or inform an authority figure, they share in the guilt of the perpetrator--at least, in my opinion.
Psychology experts say a phenomena called the "bystander effect" kicks in when a large number of people witness a crime. If you're in a crowd and no one's taking action, then inaction becomes the norm. Responsibility among the group is diffused.
It's because of this detached mentality that an innocent 15-year-old girl is in critical condition, no doubt feeling used and betrayed beyond comprehension.
If you get a chance today, please lift her up in prayer.

Wild Things

I chose pizza & soda for Max's sleepover dinner. Jeff chose salad. He wins hands-down for "Dad of the Year." Is it just me or is it seriously attractive when a guy demonstrates superior parenting skills? As I type this, Jeff's playing a game with the boys.
He insisted that we allow Max's friends to spend the night because Delaney has at least one sleepover a month and he's had...well, none! Honestly, it never occurred to me that boys would enjoy sleepovers! My brother never had any.
So far, so good. Only one friend could make it tonight (thanks to the flu just about every kid is down for the count) so the noise level is tolerable. We took the kids to see "Where the Wild Things Are." Their reviews were mixed. Boring and sad was the consensus. I thought the first and last 30 minutes of the film was brilliant...and an accurate portrayal of a childhood colored by loneliness and confusion. Kudos to Spike Jones for directing a children's movie about the reality of childhood.
Alrightee...now back to my reality. Chocolate-chip cookies, anyone?

Farewell, Mobile Friend!

After seeing me through two boyfriends, a husband and four career changes, my faithful T-Mobile companion has called it quits. She actually drowned in a mug full of water on my nightstand yesterday. I must've flipped open the phone in the middle of the night for a time check and mindlessly dunked it in the mug I keep by my bedside. Darn!
Anyway, I so heavily relied on this phone to keep track of all my friends and family's contact info, that I don't have any way of calling my loved ones at the moment. I don't even know my own mother's number! (Praise God for Facebook and email, right)?
So if you and I happen to be friends who've exchanged digits in the past, would you do me a favor and send me an email or Facebook message with your contact info?
And I'll be changing my cell number at the request of my husband so that I'll no longer have a (617) Boston area code. He's sick of calling long distance when he's trying to get ahold of me, I guess! So if you message me, I'll send you my new # in return.
THANK YOU!!!

Home Sick

Poor little guy. I know Max is really sick when he doesn't want to play board games. He doesn't have the energy to do anything but lie on the couch. But he did ask if I was gonna capture his illness on my blog. Uh...sure. Why not? He's such a ham. Even when he's not feeling well. He apparently seemed fine enough to go to school today. In fact, he begged to go to school and he was fever-free for 24 hours. But his fever returned tonight. I took his temperature and it's 100.3. He refused to eat anything and doesn't even want to drink juice because he's too congested to taste anything.

Meanwhile, Delaney is dancing on the dinner table because I broke the happy news that she got the lead in our church's Christmas play. I haven't seen her this excited since we took her to Six Flags this summer! Jeff is thrilled, too, to coach his daughter to embrace his passion for acting. It's really special--and scary--for Jeff to watch his little girl develop into a young lady with an insightful mind and passion for literature and drama. Yep...we've entered the tween years. Ok, gotta bring some water to Max.

What's a Wife to Do?

I spoke with a newlywed recently and we commiserated on one thing: What do you do when you and your husband have different standards of cleanliness? Case in point: Here's a snapshot of my husband's side of the room. Not a stitch of carpet in sight. Just heaps of dirty clothes...shirts spilling out of dresser drawers...I didn't touch a thing all week to see if it'd bother him. Nope. Fat chance of that! Normally I clean up after him here and there. Well, it just got to a point where I'm going crazy! I have to sleep in the room, too! Now here's the thing: I'm not the Queen of Clean. I'm super disorganized and I can be sloppy. But I've never seen ANYTHING like this. And we can't seem to reach a compromise on cleanliness standards. He embraces the mess. I'm embarrassed by it. 

So what do you do?

Lover's Leap

Legend has it that an Illinois boy met and fell in love with a Potawatomi girl. Since the tribes were at war, neither chief would marry them. The lovers walked around for a while trying to find a solution. When they could not find one they decided that if they could not be married they would die together. So they proceeded to the cliff, joined hands and jumped so they would be together through all eternity. Of course, it's just a legend. If you really look down that cliff you can see it's no longer than 8 feet!

That's one of many stories told at the beloved Starved Rock State Park. I haven't been back since Jeff proposed to me at the nearby Matthiesan State Park. It's the prettiest place I've found in the state to enjoy nice, paved hiking trails. It's especially nice to enjoy the park in the fall as the leaves are changing color. And the surrounding water makes the trails much more scenic, in my opinion. It kind of reminds me of a hike I took with a dear friend of mine in Walden Pond.
Of course, Jeff and I are terribly out of shape and had folks our grandparents' age pass us by! How sad is that?
But seriously, for the first time this fall season, I've actually enjoyed the fall...the crisp air, colors on the trees, and bundling up to hike a few miles. And since we were somewhat close to Chicago we drove into the city to enjoy dinner. If you like Thai food there's a place called "Tac Quick" in Wrigleyville. The menu is very Americanized so you have to ask for the "secret Thai menu." Jeff tried pan-fried duck eggs...I had the crispy pork skin dish. Very good. And cheap. But if you're not as adventurous I hear the generic stuff is good, too. Just a tip...Facebook won't let me post all my pictures to an album which has frustrated me all morning! But I'll get it done at some point.

Sew Fun

I asked Delaney to sew a button back onto my pants and she looked at me like I was kidding! "You're serious?" she asked. "You really can't sew?" Yes. Totally serious. This week my mother-in-law took the kids on a little field trip to choose some fabric to sew their own pillowcases! They were so thrilled. My goodness...if my 10-year-old stepdaughter and 7-year-old stepson can operate a sewing machine (with some help from their Grammie), I'm in trouble! I'm thinking of taking a sewing class this winter...I can add sewing to the list of many basic things I can't do--ride a bike, whistle, balance a checkbook! When will I find time to learn it all?
BTW, I apologize for being delinquent on blogging...my schedule wore me out and the dreary weather's wearing me down! Ugh...why is it winter in October?

Hard to Get

This week I had the privilege of meeting Phil Stacey (a top 5 finalist on season six of American Idol) and enjoying a private concert of his at 91.5 WCIC. Our radio station rotates his hit "You're Not Shaken"...but it doesn't do justice to his gift as a live performer.
Hearing him sing "Hard to Get" (written by Rich Mullins) cracked open the door for a whole new dimension of my relationship with Christ. I journeyed through a deep valley this year and never thought I'd see the end of a dark tunnel...I also felt some pressure to have it all together as a radio personality for a Christian station. I coached myself to put on a happy face when I felt anything but happy...and felt guilty as I struggled with private doubts and fears.
So when Phil shared that he felt the same heat, it was very encouraging for me to know that even seasoned believers struggle. And at the same time, God understands our moments when we feel abandoned...and he's got us in the palm of His hand all the way. He sees the big picture while we're struggling in our flesh. So this song has become a prayer for me and I hope a source of encouragement for you, too (here's an abbreviated version of the lyrics):

You who live in heaven
Hear the prayers of those of us who live on earth
Who are afraid of being left by those we love
And who get hardened by the hurt

Do you remember when You lived down here where we all scrape
To find the faith to ask for daily bread
Did You forget about us after You had flown away
Well I memorized every word You said

Still I'm so scared, I'm holding my breath
While You're up there just playing hard to get

Will those who mourn be left uncomforted
While You're up there just playing hard to get?
And I know you bore our sorrows
And I know you feel our pain
And I know it would not hurt any less
Even if it could be explained

And I know that I am only lashing out
At the One who loves me most
And after I figured this, somehow
All I really need to know

Is if You who live in eternity
Hear the prayers of those of us who live in time
We can't see what's ahead
And we can not get free of what we've left behind

I'm reeling from these voices that keep screaming in my ears
All the words of shame and doubt, blame and regret
I can't see how You're leading me unless You've led me here
Where I'm lost enough to let myself be led
And so You've been here all along I guess
It's just Your ways and You are just plain hard to get

My favorite girl

"A little Catherine-in-training"...was how a special little girl by the name of Maddy was introduced to me tonight by her sweet mother. I know, I know. That sounds awfully scary! :) Maddy tells me she listens to the morning show every day and she colored the most beautiful pictures for me, which I now proudly display on my desk. Meeting Maddy was the highlight of my week! And I've had an awfully good start to the week! Thank you, Maddy, for inviting me into your princess world. I love you! You've now become a part of my heart.

Yes to fashion...or deny myself?

The only fun thing about fall is the fashion--at least in my opinion. Cashmere sweaters. Pull-on boots. Scarves. It almost makes the cold snap worth it. BUT I married a man who balks when I buy something I don't genuinely need...or spend money anyplace other than a thift shop! He even stretches out his contact dailies for months on end! It's been a huge challenge for me.
But it's also showed me what a huge learning curve I have in using my resources wisely. I could spend $30 on a new sweater...or send it to a child in a third world country through organizations like Compassion Intl. As a Christian I often struggle with guilt when desiring nice things. Right now I'm debating whether to purchase a new car. Is it selfish of me to want a new Mazda 5 when I could keep trying to maintain a '96 Camry? My husband wants to save our money to do something REALLY BIG for God's kingdom. His focus is maximal eternal impact.
What do you think? Do you feel bad to have more than the bare necessities?

"A" for Effort

Poor Jeff. I put him in charge of dinner duty this week since I'm working overtime. He was so excited to make homemade pizza tonight. He spent hours kneading the dough and letting it rise in the oven yesterday in preparation for tonight's dinner. The final result? In his words--not mine--"It's bad!" The pizza was, well, doughy. Grossly undercooked. But on the bright side, the toppings were great--fresh mozarella cheese, tomatoes, basil, mushrooms.
Jeff's now lying on the couch in defeat. He said it's his first and last time in the kitchen. Gosh...I hope not! I tried to encourage him on his effort and thanked him repeatedly for stepping up and trying to make a homecooked meal on a week where I'm slammed at work. But as we cleaned up in the kitchen tonight, Jeff said, "Catherine, this makes me appreciate what you do for our family every night." Wow. Who cares about inedible pizza? That acknowledgment filled me up this evening.

Where the wild things are...

Jeff & I got a little frisky at the zoo tonight! Our spirits were high as we toasted Mr. & Mrs. Radovanovic as they began their new life together. The zoo's a perfect place for a wedding celebration...How fun to traipse around wild animals in dressy clothes! Despite the rain, the kids had a blast playing hide-and-seek throughout the zoo since it was closed to the public. I especially enjoyed watching the giraffes past moonlight, munching on dinner in their cages. What gorgeous creatures...(Hey, speaking of gorgeous, is my husband cute or what?!).

When the DJ called all the single ladies to the dance floor for the bride to toss her bouquet, some locked themselves in the bathroom and others hid in the back...but Delaney and her friend were front and center--and actually caught the bouquet! It was pretty funny.
But my FAVORITE part of the evening was connecting with the bride's stepmom, Jill. Out of the blue, the Lord blessed me with a soul sister. We shared a heart to heart from one stepmom to another. Finally--a woman who truly understands my journey! I cried tears of relief after our conversation...our journeys have been strikingly similar...and she shared such pearls of wisdom, I'm spending the rest of the evening pouring all she shared into my diary.
Thank you, Jesus, for turning my no good, very bad Friday into a so good, very great Saturday!

Going to the chapel...

...and going on Safari! My small group is in a baking frenzy this weekend to make dessert for our small group leader's wedding. Instead of having a single ginormous wedding cake, they asked friends to contribute their own unique wedding cake creations. According to the groom, it's a southern tradition...And I have the most fun job of creating cupcakes for the kids! Since the reception's at the zoo, I topped the cupcakes with safari animals!
It's really relaxing for me to be in the zone of baking. I woke up early this morning, spent some time with the Lord...and then cranked up some music so that I could forget about my worries and just blast that icing away. I love being creative with fun food! BTW, I made some coffee this morning, forgetting I'm out of creamer and my fridge isn't working well anyway...so I threw in a dollop of icing. Not bad! Try it sometime!

One of those days...

One of my favorite books of all time is "Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day." I'm having one of those days. It started at 5:00 this morning when my car wouldn't start. I woke up my not so chipper husband to take me to work. He was a little grumpy when he returned home and was able to easily jump my car and thought I just forgot to flip off my car light. Right? Wrong.
Our lovely office manager at 91.5 WCIC (love ya, Katie!) drove me home to retrieve my car and it wouldn't start again! So she graciously drove me to my doctor's appointment. I endured a painful and expensive procedure with inconclusive results. Great. When that was over, I called my husband to pick me up from the doctor's office and take me to get the car fixed.
At this point Jeff was very apologetic for being in a bad mood and was incredibly sweet. The highlight of my day? Getting a hug from my husband. Another low point of my day? Taking my '96 Camry to the mechanic who's so sick of my car problems, he doesn't even want to fix them. He advised that I buy a new car. It's gonna cost several hundred dollars to fix everything that's wrong. Is it worth it? Well, I don't have a lot of leisure time to make this decision.
I was actually planning on driving to Chicago to see my parents one last time before they leave for Hawaii. Now that's out of the question.
So I figured I should get started on those cupcakes I promised to make for a wedding tomorrow! Jeff & I rushed to the store to purchase baking supplies so I could get started on the treats. However, when I stepped foot in the kitchen, a puddle spanning half the kitchen floor pooled around my heels. Ugh...the refrigerator is broken, too!
So as I type this, I'm sopping wet from kitchen clean-up. When will this day end??? I broke down and cried for a few minutes.
I think I'll put everything aside for now, take a deep breath, and PPRRAAAAAYYYYY super hard for the Lord to give me patience and trust that even though my life is messy at the moment, He will see me through and someday everything will make sense. What I really want to do is throw my dishes at the door to vent frustration...but that'll just lead to more clean-up!